I'll have to check out that Wasted Youth. I didn't notice the problems with Blow Me Sandwich 9 and WOW, I haven't seen it yet, but the Darkko putting out a bad piece of work? It's like the sun not rising in the morning.
Equilibrium Ep 1 - review by fu_q| Author | Post |
|---|---|
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | Hey Now has his own quickie review thread, so I thought I'd like to start my own version. The occasional mini-review (if I'm moved to write one), favorite movie rentals of the week, recent purchases, and other miscellaneous flotsam, jetsam and effluvia from the twisted mind of Cumwhipper. To whit, here's my Movie of the Week (or last rental period, or whatever). This one is a no-brainer: "Wasted Youth", from RLD. It's Mark Wood's new line focusing on newbies, and this first release is HOT. The cast has some real cuties, including Adrianna Faust (this girl is walking wet-dream material. Her ass is a wonder to behold, and her natural, pointy tits are fucking awesome), Presley Maddox (what a slutty girl - I see BIG things in this girl's future), Ryzell (does anal like she's been doing it for years, and maybe she has!). Good production values on top of a great cast made this a real pleasure to watch. Watched a lot of dreck this week as well. The worst of the worst: "Gag Factor #22". They fucked up the digital transfer, and ended up making it a smaller bordered screen within the normal 16:9 screen. HORRIBLE and virtually unwatchable, despite the opening scene in which some poor girl blows a snot bubble half the size of her head and KEEPS it there while some guy shoots stills of it. One of the stills made the boxcover. The boxcover is better than the entire movie. Avoid this like the plague. "Blow Me Sandwich #9" - Suffers from the exact same mastering issues as "Gaga Factor #22". WTF??? Are they deliberately trying to piss off customers? I NEVER would have expected such a gaffe from Zero Tolerance. They're known for their production values. Sad. "Slut Collectors" - One of Johnny Darkko's latest efforts. Every scene was filmed in a loft, and there's not enough frickin' light. To top it off, Darkko got cute with the effects, and added a sepia-like coloring to every scene. Ruined it. Even the presence of Lexi Love can't save this stinkbomb. Sorry Darkko, but it didn't work for me at ALL. Dishonorable Mention: Another one that is barely worth a rental is the latest "Down The Hatch" - don't remember the number, but it features Sindee Jennings. I haven't really enjoyed a Down The Hatch release since about #15 - the one where Hillary Scott gargles 5+ loads and the bubbles billow up and out of her mouth like some alien being (awesome scene). Sindee Jennings is over-acting to a ridiculous degree. It's a sad thing - her scenes make me pity her more than anything else. She needs to get out of porn and find something she actually at least SEEMS to enjoy. Rest of the film is just boring, in my opinion. Cumwhipper, out. [Link] |
| HeyNow Oblivious Gold Star Hey! 5965 Posts 1/03 | I'll have to check out that Wasted Youth. I didn't notice the problems with Blow Me Sandwich 9 and WOW, I haven't seen it yet, but the Darkko putting out a bad piece of work? It's like the sun not rising in the morning. |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | Yeah, even Darkko can lay an egg. I love Load Sharing and Suck It Dry, but even some of those scenes are lacking in light, and I seem to recall a bit of soft-focus stuff going on as well in a few scenes in those movies. I tend to prefer straightforward camerawork, good lighting, etc.. Leave the "art house" effects out of porn - it wreaks of pretense. |
| Joey Starr Senior Member Still wanking after all these years. 8082 Posts 10/00 | |
| Joey Starr Senior Member Still wanking after all these years. 8082 Posts 10/00 | |
| Joey Starr Senior Member Still wanking after all these years. 8082 Posts 10/00 | |
| Joey Starr Senior Member Still wanking after all these years. 8082 Posts 10/00 | |
| Joey Starr Senior Member Still wanking after all these years. 8082 Posts 10/00 | |
| Len Nicodemo Doctor of Pornography (Po.D.) On avatar hiatus 1224 Posts 2/06 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | |
| Oral B. Member 349 Posts 4/05 | |
| steed Member 426 Posts 11/05 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | A couple quickies... "Cockasian" (Digital Playground) - Not only an extremely amusing title for a series, but a damned good release. If you like cute asian girls getting turned out, and particularly if you have a big-screen TV (shot with high-end cams and in true widescreen - nice!), you'll almost certainly enjoy this movie. The standouts: Tia Tanaka taking on 2 guys (good God, this girl is cute!); Evelyn Lynn (a cute 18-year-old newbie) also taking on two guys - the double-blowjob action here is SCALDING - some of the best I've ever seen. This girl seems to love having cocks in her mouth. HOT!; a BTS with Charmane Star - the blowjob action here is balls-draining stuff. Extremely well captured and TONS of ECWC from one of the most beautiful women EVER to do porn. The fucking is with condom, but I pretty much FF'd over it anyway - the BJ was the standout for me. "I love My Pearl Necklace" (5th Element) - Yet another DVD where they have a fat border around the entire picture. It's like watching everything 1/2 sized. Makes the movie unwatchable! I can't understand what the fuck is happening here, but this is the THIRD movie I've seen in the last 2 weeks that has this problem. A hot cast, totally wasted here. Skip it. Enjoy! |
| tritone Deactivated User 1009 Posts 4/03 | I TOTALLY agree with you about the black borders around the Blow Me Sandwich #9 movie. WTF were they thinking? Either you go full widescreen 16:9 for real, or you do full screen 4:3. None of this BS in-between stuff. It was like I was watching a movie within a picture frame. I can't figure out if they actually intended to do this or if there was some kind of mastering problem. Edited by - tritone on 10/31/2006 2:57:56 PM |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | "Deep Throat This #30" - Great cast, and some smokin' hot oral action with some truly MONSTER facials delivered by the usual suspects. The Deep Throat This series is solid, blue-collar porn. It doesn't pretend to be anything it isn't. The lighting and color ranges from fair to good. But there's plenty of good close-ups and ECWC. Almost every girl gets 2 cocks to suck. Kara Mynor, Vanessa Lynn, Ryann Reynolds, Chelsie Rae, Addison Rose, and covergirl Persia DeCarlo were the standouts in my opinion. Ryann Reynolds literally makes love to her stunt cocks - you have to see this to get what I mean - but it's HOT. Addison Rose - OMFG! - She is awesome. She looks so good with her mouth and lips stretched around a cock it's ridiculous. Jessi Summers is not my cup of tea, but she gets absolutely DRENCHED by two giant loads - it's awesome. I rented this one a few weeks ago, and remembered how good the Addison Rose and Ryann Reynolds scenes were - and I remembered right. I may just buy this one. 8.0 out of 10.0 - Best of the recent bunch. "Who's That Girl #3" (Vouyer Media) - Another installment in a fairly middle-of-the-road series. Covergirl Presley Maddox is pretty hot, and I like the way she downed 5 loads in her extended scene. Some other girl named Brooke was smokin' hot, a really cute, tiny girl with AMAZING natural tits and a phat ass. And she downed 4 loads like it was nothing. About a 6.0 out of 10.0 - worth checking out for Presley and Brooke. "Teens Craving Cum" (PXP) - A retread of a previously released del Toro movie - basically they renamed it. I think the original title was "Cum Addicted Teens" or some such thing. I absolutely PANNED the original release of the movie. Not one of the girls swallows the cum, and they're supposedly addicted to it. Watching this movie again, there were a few hot moments, but nothing all that strokeable. A nice cast (Aubrey Addams is almost never boring). 4.0 out of 10.0 - barely worth a rental. "She's Got a Cum Fixation #2" - Second in Benjamin Bratt's series. Boring, pint-by-numbers porn, with mediocre camera work. And only ONE girl actually swallowed any cum. Every other scene ends with the girl basically hiding the cum in her mouth as the camera fades out. Totally lame. Skip it. Kelly Brookx raises this to a 2.0 out of 10.0 - but I wouldn't even bother renting this one (unless you have a fixation). Cumwhipper, out! |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | Samantha Rose, in "New Chicks Cum First #2". She gets 2 guys working her over like a ragdoll. When they get her in piledriver, they make her keep spreading her pussy wide open. Soon, a LOT of air has built up inside her pussy, and we get treated to some extremely funny, and extremely LOUD pussy farts. Awesome stuff. Samantha is a nasty girl. I want to see more. Samantha Sin, in "One on One #6" - best girl in the movie, and an extremely hot scene. I'm so sick of seeing John Strong in every other frickin' scene, I almost couldn't bear to watch another one, but Samantha is so hot, I quickly forgot about the fact that it was Mr. Strong delivering the pounding. I've loved this girl since seeing her in "Tonsil Train #6". A very hot scene. Adriana Faust has a very enjoyable scene in this movie as well. That girl's body is just insane! Best movie by far: "Swallow this #5". The Gigi and Maya Hills scenes are screen-meltingly hot. Almost worth the price of the movie. The DVD itself has a lot of production problems, including horrible color in most of the scenes, and some weird camera problem that causes the action to appear very "jerky". If you frame-by-frame through the action, every 3rd frame is repeated twice. This is extremely annoying and almost ruined the movie. Still, the Gigi and Maya scenes are so hot, I must recommend this to all blowjob and cumswallow fans. 7.5 out of 10.0 |
| HeyNow Oblivious Gold Star Hey! 5965 Posts 1/03 | |
| Lexi_Love Member Lets Talk About SEX ! 301 Posts 10/05 | |
| Mike Quasar Zero Tolerance Reluctant pornographer 1768 Posts 7/01 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | I posed a question about this in another thread about a different movie. I've seen this THREE times in the last few weeks. I'd love to hear what you find out. |
| Mike Quasar Zero Tolerance Reluctant pornographer 1768 Posts 7/01 | |
| Mike Quasar Zero Tolerance Reluctant pornographer 1768 Posts 7/01 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 |
Oh well, no big deal. Sad that I can't watch this movie though. It has a great cast. |
| Mike Quasar Zero Tolerance Reluctant pornographer 1768 Posts 7/01 |
|
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | "Tonsil Train #6" - I think this is the third or fourth time I've rented this movie! I may as well surrender and buy the damned thing. LOL. The Nikki Nievez and Samantha Sin scenes are more than worth the price of the DVD. Samantha Sin sucking all those dicks is so strokeable it's ridiculous. She smiles, jokes with the guys, looks at the camera a TON, spends a lot of time deepthroating almost all the cocks, and even laughs at how difficult it is to get the thickest cock all the way down her throat. AWESOME scene. |
| tritone Deactivated User 1009 Posts 4/03 |
Could you please explain why you would shoot a movie in 16:9 not make it anamorphic? I am not being an ass here, I just want to know if there is a technical or budgetary reason to do so. Because when I see 16:9 widescreen now, I expect the picture is going to fill up my entire 32" widescreen LCD like the Digital Playground releases or the ones from Vouyer Media. MY TV config is fine because when I put one of those discs in, they expand to make it truly widescreen and the subjects look "natural" and not strechted to make it fit. But when I put in your disc, its treats it like its a 4:3 and centeres horizontally around black borders. Now thi s is fine because it preserves the aspect ratio. What I don't like is that WITHIN THAT 4:3 PICTURE THERE IS ANOTHER LEVEL OF "LETTERBOXING" that puts black bars on the top and bottom! That makes NO SENSE to me? Why is that happening? I understand that I should see them on a normal 4:3 television, but on a true widescreen TV it should expand and fill my screen while preserving the right look of the scene. |
| Mike Quasar Zero Tolerance Reluctant pornographer 1768 Posts 7/01 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | The rest of the scenes are barely strokeable. It's like they used a different cam to shoot these other scenes. The camera seems to be capturing the action in a very jerky manner. Very unpleasant to watch - almost nausea-inducing. Different set as well. Oh well. Oral fans should definitely check out this DVD just to watch Maya and Gigi. |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | "Frosty Finish" from Vouyer Productions - I really wanted to like this movie. Hell, it's got Tia Tanaka and Celina Cross in their own blowbangs - how bad can it be? But it was mediocre at best. Not enough close-ups, for one thing. And not enough ECWC. There are so many other great blowbang lines out there, it really takes something new and different to amaze me. 5.0 out of 10.0 "Send It Down" from PXP. New director Claudio, ably assisted by Kristie Love, have put together a very nice blowbang movie. Definitely worth a rental (I almost purchased it the other day). The Whitney Stevens scene is hot, and the Amber Rayne scene is even hotter. 7.5 out of 10.0 "Spring Chickens #17" (Chico Wang, for Diabolic)- Worth seeing for the Chelsie Rae and Whitney Stevens scenes alone. Whitney takes on 2 guys here, and some of the views of this girl's enormous tits swinging and swaying are real drool material. I'm loving this Whitney girl. I'm looking for any scenes I can find with her. She sometimes is a little on the quite side in her scenes, but with tits like hers, who gives a fuck!? 6.5 out of 10.0 "Gang Bang My Face" (Jake Malone, for Evil Angel) - Finally got this - the order took almost 2 frickin' weeks. Still, it was worth the wait. Incredible movie. Sasha Grey deepthroats the likes of Brandon Iron, Lefty LaRue, Tone Capone and Lee Bang, and she does it over and over. She gets her face slapped, spit on, cummed on, and just seems to love every minute of it. This is AVN award material if there ever was such a thing. And Lexi Love's scene is among her best ever. As the guys start cumming in her mouth, it turns into a bubble machine and the sperm bubbles billow up and out of her mouth - big, shiny sperm bubbles - and Jake wisely captures it all up-close and with tones of ECWC from Lexi. Phew! These two scenes alone are worth the price of admission. There's tons more to recommend about this movie, but I won't ruin all the rest of the surprises. 10.0 out of 10.0 (I'll try not to give this rating to too many movies - maybe one or two a year - but if this movie doesn't qualify, nothing does) |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | Best recent rental is Mark Wood's new blowjob-only movie "Liquid Diet #2" . Cute girls, very nice tease in almost every scene, and tons of ECWC during the oral sequences. Oh, and did I mention cute girls? LOL See my mini-review of "Liquid Diet #2" in this thread. 9.5 out of 10.0 on the Cumwhipper scale. The Brandy scene is KILLER! |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 | 2 MUST-SEE movies - "Teens With Tits #9" (Has Bree Olson and Natasha Nice, just to name 2 of the very hot girls in this cast), and "Sperm Receptacles #2" - Mike John's latest spermathon. Both movies are truly wonderful. TWT9 is an aberration. I usually hate Sal Genoa movies, but this one rises WAY above his usual fare. 8.5 out of 10.0 on the Cumwhipper scale. SR2 has a great cast, and the series is developing its own personality - combines the best elements of "Throat Gaggers, "No Cum Dodging Allowed", and "Good Source of Iron" - and this is a VERY good thing. 9.0 out of 10.0 on the Cumwhipper scale |
| HeyNow Oblivious Gold Star Hey! 5965 Posts 1/03 | |
| Cumwhipper Senior Member 4050 Posts 3/04 |
| Use the code below to link to this topic or a specific post. |
| URL of this thread |
| Link to this post with HTML |
| Link to this post with Forum Code |