All Forums > The Porn Pool > The Porn Pool Forum Page 856 > How do you rate an adult dvd
AuthorPost
duganrm
Member

100 Posts
10/99
Posted - Nov 9 1999 : 1:59PM
Two thumbs up or 5 stars just don't seem to properly rate an adult dvd. So what are the options instead? Two fingers up(stole it from an ad banner) or how about two hands on. Anyone have some better ideas?
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-[url=52782]Richard
Evil_Rip
Senior Member

Power overwhelming
1117 Posts
12/99
Posted - Jun 6 2000 : 8:48PM
How about the Schlong system. Its a very strict system with only two ratings.
UP and Down.
;P

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Darkmage
Member

State of Denial
328 Posts
11/99
Posted - Jun 6 2000 : 9:18PM
I think we should have a more holistic body parts scale. You can judge the DVD by the body part that you would be willing to cut off if god would let you be in the film.
This way, you could say that "I would give my right arm to bang her in the elevator like that" or "She was cute, but I wouldn't pull a Van Gogh and cut off an ear for her."
The ultimate rating would, of course, be "I would give my right nut to be the guy banging [insert actress here]."
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"There's a sucker born every minute, but swallowers are hard to find."
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Who is [ invalid url ] | The [url=464724]Darkmage Special</A
[This message has been edited by Darkmage (edited June 06, 2000).]
Drew Black
broken crankshaft

8011 Posts
9/99
Posted - Jun 6 2000 : 9:54PM
Darkmage -
On the flip side of that scale is the beer rating system. Some of the gals that I have seen in porn are soooo ugly that you would have to get seriously drunk to consider doing them. I think most everyone is familiar with this system.
Oneloa
Member

848 Posts
2/00
Posted - Jun 6 2000 : 10:02PM
Many many years ago, Hustler had a rating scale of an erection (they may still use it for all I know). A perfect movie is fully erect, while at the other end of the scale... if a movie is really bad it gets fully limp with a comment that you couldn't get it up with a crane.
Kapalua mentioned that a movie should be rated by a number of wet panties. When the movie is really bad, you get chaffed from the dryness.
 
Morrigan
Member

Dark side of the moon
73 Posts
4/00
Posted - Jun 7 2000 : 6:29PM
Nah, I figure that if I take my panties off after watching a porn, throw 'em at the wall and they DON'T stick, it was a Baaaaad movie.
-M



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