Evil_RIP

P.S. Steph always has great Advice follow it...

Edited by - evil_rip on May 19 2001

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girls are shy too, no matter how outgoing you may think some of us are. i have looked exactly the same my whole life (seriously), but i didn't start getting the guys until i talked to them, until i asked them out, until i made the first move. yeah, there were rejections, but no big deal, you move on. being able to handle a rejection here and there will make you much confident than thinking everyone wants you (that's just ego, not confidence.) - especially when you realize that rejection is about your compatibility with that person, not about you.

if you see a girl that you want to get to know, then go do it. play it safe in the beginning - ask her to do something non-datey like getting coffee. or just go over and ask her what she's reading, or if she comes there often (kidding.)

KingyEGG, you have to love yourself first. then you will be confident, then you can go after what you want. you don't need to change anything but your perception of yourself.

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No worries, KingyEGG she's out there you just have to find her. And it's much less about looks than you probably think.

Are you socializing? Do you meet people thru mutual friends or have involvment with your community?
Are you approachable? What is your body language saying?
Shyness is not neccessariy a turn off, but you have to be available to some degree if you have hopes of meeting someone.

Besides all that, sex everyday is not the end all be all, lol

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In order for you to feel good about yourself, I suggest doing something for yourself. Like, buy some new clothes or start working out. Lifting some weights will super boost your confidence level and women will start to notice.

- [ invalid url ]

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It saddens me to hear someone so upset and with low self esteem - buck up little camper!!

Empire Man,
Adult DVD Empire

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The first thing you got to do, man, is stop feeling so sorry for yourself. I'm coming up on 27 and I've never had sex. I've never even had an in depth relationship with anyone. People tell me I'm real attractive. But I don't think attractiveness on the outside has that much to do with it. I've seen women who I thought were drop dead gorgeous. Then I got to know them and I never saw them as all that attractive. Others, I thought were so-so, then I got to know them, and I swear I thought they were the hottest thing I'd ever seen. Perception can be strange. But anyways, I'm trying to say that your looks probably aren't the reason you don't have a lady. And neither is any other one specific reason.

We're all unique, man. We all got our own thing going on. And I do believe there are certainly ladies out there who could grow to love you. But you can't be going around thinking you suck and all. That's self-defeating. If there's something about yourself you don't like try to change it. You say your too short. There's nothing you can do about that. Get over it. Stop whining. Some people are born blind. We're not all handed a silver plate at birth. We only got the cards we've been dealt. As for not being outgoing. That you can do something about. Make a conscious effort to get out more. Try to hook up with guy friends. Sometimes their girlfriends got girlfriends. In the meantime, practice treating the special ladies that are in your life (i.e., mom, sister, aunt, etc.) extra special. Make sure you help them with household chores as it seems they always (unfairly) get stuck doing that stuff. Get the carryout food so they don't have to go out. Those sorts of things. Treat them right! Share the burdens that come with living. Start developing the skills you'll need when you do find a partner in life.

As for the sex, man, find a way to deal. Buy a sex toy. Get a couple porno fliks. It's not the same as the real thing, I guess. But your doing the best you can with your situation. Your 21 (young) and got a lot to learn. You'll get there. But don't be whining and stuff, man. Don't be feeling sorry for yourself. When you get the "i hate myself" thing going in your head, shut it down. It's not accurate.

A dear friend of mine once told me, "Girls just want to have fun." And I think he's right. If you can show a girl a good time, she's going to enjoy your company. Keep that in mind.

Personally, I got a huge crush on the wife of a longtime friend of mine. How's that for luck? I am so smitten. She's an awesome catch. My friend is super lucky. We all got our problems ;)

Good luck, man. And stop feeling sorry for yourself! Be patient, it'll happen if you stick with it.

Edited by - Trunks on May 23 2001

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Sexual partners are overrated. What are they really providing you? Release from tension? Validation of yourself as a worthy human being?

These are the things society wants you to belive when you see a couple.

So what if you paid for sex. Sex in itself is nothing.

What you should think about is how do you feel. You are feeling lonely. A lot of people feel lonely. Ask yourself why do you feel lonely?
Why do you feel you need someone in your life?

I suppose I do not have any real advice, but do try this.
Think of one thing that you are proud of doing.
Think of one thing that you can do really well.
And just think about those things when you are feeling down. Or when you need to build up courage to talk to someone.

Fin.

TigerDragon

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hang in there...shes out there somewhere but i think the other members gave you some real pearls of wisdom about liking yourself first.

-lunacy-

hang in there...shes out there somewhere but i think the other members gave you some real pearls of wisdom about liking yourself first.

-lunacy-

hang in there...shes out there somewhere but i think the other members gave you some real pearls of wisdom about liking yourself first.

-lunacy-

hang in there...she's out there somewhere but i think the other members gave you some real pearls of wisdom about liking yourself first.

-lunacy-

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Damn..even a monkey can get laid with a woman!

Yes..a monkey..okay..there is this guy I know that looks like a monkey...and he found a chick that looks like a female monkey! From that day on..I knew..that in this world, if you're a guy..there is a female version of you out there waiting for you.

But seriously..I find getting laid easy..just be nice to the girl..and don't come on to her strong..and she will give in. At least in my area in New York..girls are so horny..pussy is sold by the pound in many corners. And we're talking about clean pussy that hasn't been touched!

Pussy is everywhere..girls love to fuck so much..but they deny it. At least that is what some have told me.

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