I keep seeing articles in men’s mags and on the net, discussing performance pressure, wtf are they on about? I’m at a lost as to how guys feel sex can go so wrong that they feel like they fucked up (pun intended)! I mean, you start off with some passionate kissing and cuddling, which is easier than falling off a bike! You move on to some oral, if she’s unresponsive you can always ask, “how’d you like it”. Then it’s time for some penetration, if you’re so turned on by her that you’re gonna pop straight away, cum during foreplay and fuck second time around! I just read an online article and saw this quote: “the first time is when the pressure is at its greatest. No matter how good you think you are, you have to prove it all over again. It’s like turning up for a job interview without any references” What is this guy on! What does he think he has to prove and why? Can’t you just be yourself, have sex and what happens happens, do women really expect/want you to fuck them like a porn star, anyway! Aren’t things like sensuality and affection more important than the mechanics of sex? I can honestly say, I've never felt perfomance pressure and whatever happens, I feel I can easily adapt to the situtation, or just laugh it off!
The joys of sport fucking? I don't know. It's nice that guys want to get their partners off, I suppose. I mean, it beats indifference, right? However, I figure if my partner is keeping score then we're not playing the same game, anyway.
Actually I can relate to feeling "Pressure to Perform." I work a lot and I am also a fuck machine under the right circumstances, unfortunately those circumstances are rarely right as of lately. I have given the girl I am seeing some mind blowing orgasms, I really enjoy sex. I also enjoy making money. Plus I have another hobby that takes up a lot of my time. So I have to balance the three. Work, Fucking, Riding my bike. Work, I'm in a starve or fiest business, so that is a no brainer for me no matter how much I would rather be fucking. She knows that. When work calls me on Sunday she knows I am going in. I have a general idea of when I have to work and make my plans around it, but I never turn down work. So after I work 100 hours a week I am in no "mood" to fuck, I'm plain worn out. But the girl I see only works 40 hours a week (a normal job), and she is ALWAYS ready to fuck. And if I do wanna fuck, it is sometimes lame and selfish but she takes what she can get. Sounds bad I know. And when I do have time off she might be horny as hell, but I say I gotta ride my bike, can't pass up the weather, she just jumps on the back and we split. I do love riding my bike. We have fun doing that too. Even that makes her horny. Crazy. So riding a bike isn't always the carefree life, the wind beats me down and wears me out. SO on my day off I am beat from work and beat from riding and she is wound up so bad, she is an animal. All I wanna do is sleep. But hey, some days I am an animal too!!!
[Link]
Rubberhole Deactivated User
256 Posts 2/10
Posted - Aug 17 2010 : 9:19AM
^^^^you are totally missing the definition of the question posted^^^^
I think pressure to perform isn't always about whether or not the guy gets his partner off. As we've seen in other threads there are a lot of guys out there who have difficulty climaxing with partner sex. I imagine there is incredible pressure on those guys wondering if they will be able to get off or not, and wondering how their partner is going to handle it if they don't, and knowing she is probably going to be disappointed... that just HAS to have an effect on performance.
@Rubberhole, I don't think I articulated myself properly the first time.Got any links we can read?When a woman isn't satisfied after having sex with her.Passionate kissing requires PASSION in my opinion. For me it is pretty hard to get "Passionate" with a woman if my mind is elsewhere. Cuddling??? That is an aftersex moment for me, I don't cuddle much prior to having sex.That sounds very mechanical to me, again, just my opinion. Sex for me is far from "mechanical." If I have to ask her how she likes it, totally a mood breaker, I can feel it in her body if she likes it or not. After I do oral on a girl I do not go straight to penetrating her with my cock, I like to use my fingers to make her cum prior to fucking her. I totally disagree with the above quote. And hey, to keep things light and humorous, I'm totally not knocking your post Bobcat!!! I'm not as young as you are and popping off the second time, GO FOR IT!!!!I get this quote, because unless you have discussed likes and dislikes with the girl you are going out on a date with and things get hot and heavy you have no idea what she likes sexually. You just kinda go with the flow. Personlly I like to push every limit a girl has the first time I fuck her, I want to take her to the edge and back again before making her cum with my cock. If she has a lot of reservations I don't "get into her." And when I say reservations I don't mean gangbangs and watersports. I want to know what makes her cum, I want to make her cum harder than she ever has before. I can just feel this in a woman when I have sex with her. It's all exploratory. So here is one for you,(hypothetical of course) a guy tells a girl he likes to fuck rough and prefers to be the dominant one. He sticks his cock in her and fucks her until he cums, but he doesn't hit the right spots and is far from "rough."I'm not sure what the guy is on, What does he have to prove? He has to prove he can satisfy the woman. Why? I'm not sure.I totally agree a person should, sorry to chop your sentence.Yes they do in my experience, they want to be fucked sensless. So if you are a lame duck the first time you might not get a repeat performance.Depends on what he feels is sensual and affectionate and what she feels is sensual and affectionate. Once you place an importance level on any act it becomes mechanical. It is my opinion that one just needs to feel it. Timing varies from person to person. Some girls just want to get fucked hard right now and others want a lot of foreplay, body rubbing, kissing and so forth.Super!!!!!Not sure, you would have to link the articles you are reading for a better answer than my previous post. I just said I do feel performance pressure at times in my previous post, or are you just talking about "First Time" performance pressure? I would imagine women feel a certain amount of "Performance Pressure" too the first time. Are these articles you are reading all talking about "First Time Performances?" I've been so busy at work recently I haven't had a lot of time to fuck the living daylights out of the girl I am seeing. She has a threesome pretty much set up for Sunday but I don't feel like doing it. I haven't seen her all week and the girl she has lined up is moving far away next week so I am thinking what is the point if we are never going to see her again. I know I am going onto a major ramble here. Saturday nights are our usual fuck like maniacs night, but I don't even get done with work until after 1 am. The only thing I'm looking forward to doing on Sunday is making a spinach/cheese stuffed pasta dish with fresh basil. She is bouncing off the wall horny. I have this really fucked up contract with my work and it's taking most of my time and energy. My mind really isn't on sex right now and that put's me in a position where I feel I am under pressure to perform, because I know she wants to fuck like a pornstar. I had to flat out tell her that I will not be much for fucking this weekend, she understands, and she will do whatever she can to persaude me otherwise, and it might work, but it will be vanilla sex. I'm just ramblin now, sorry Bobcat.
^ I guess we have a totally different outlook to sex! Fucking like they do in porn is something I've tried but just isn't for me, I don't enjoy it. I wasn't that aware that it was the prefered "style" of others either. I've met only one chick who was up for having ten bags of shit fucked out of her, all the other partners I've had wouldn't have tolerrated it. Anyway, thanks for your reply, it's always interesting to hear others opinions and perhaps the reason I don't get this "performance pressure" thing is because I don't see myself as a performer, not in the porn movie sense!
It's not so much as fucking like they do in porn as much as it is in ravishing her in ways she never imagined. I am coming off of a bit of an ego trip here tonight as I kicked things up a notch with this girl I am seeing. It all started out nice and gentle and then got rougher and rougher until she simply, well I can't say she couldn't take it anymore because she will. I am going to have to write a story about this, but don't have the time. I didn't have any "Pressure to Perform" tonight. But now I have "Pressure to Perform" Saturday night. I hope I am up for it.
^What about being more passive? It's something I'm getting more and more into, it shifts the performing over to the women! I find it a big turn-on, to let the women take the lead and I like to be pampared by her. Like, just let her have your cock to play with, most women will suck cock for hours if you let them, then let her ride you, watching a women fuck you is hot and she knows when the right spot is being hit.
Audrey Madison Interview
Posted - Aug 16 2010 : 3:43PM