Am I spoilt or just a total bastard ? (page 2)

Author	Post
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 1:46AM lindi wrote: Omigod, croy is right! Click to expand Do we have to let Hardz know that I'm not normally lucid? [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 5:25AM I was debating whether or not to post this. I have insomnia, so what the heck. In a heathy and open relationship, the "looking after number one" is going to have to change to "looking after us". Is it going to be with this girlfriend or another? It is possible to have a long term disfunctional relationship without that thought process, but that is loud (for everybody else). If everything else falls in place, maybe you never have to have it at all. But you pursue both, so clearly you aren't thinking that way. [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 10:24AM Sorry about calling you a girl mate How come you don't like centipedes ? I love insects esp. spiders. I'll tell you a little spider story.........a few years ago (when I used to live alone) a house spider lived above my wardrobe. It didn't bother me and I didn't bother it, but she must have found a boyfriend or something because one day I came home from work and there were all these little babies on her web. Now I don't kill animals, so I planned to put them outside the next day. I come home the next day and they're all gone (inc. the web).....hummm that's strange I thought, so I asked my girl what she did that morning in my apartment....She points to the vacuum cleaner. Now I've never hit her out of anger, but fuck me I came so close. [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 10:29AM Oh, I'd still like to know more about this biting thing. Ted Bundy liked to bite too, so I hope that's just a coincidence [Link]

Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 10:34AM Here's a question off the top of my head, If someone likes the taste of another persons blood, where's the best place to get a drink without leaving scars ? [Link]
oatmeal Meat Popsicle Seeking Beauty 1738 Posts 8/04	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 10:58AM Hardz wrote: I know most people here think my girlfriend is some poor victim. Nothing could be further from the truth. I work hard to provide for her and devote myself to her needs. She lives a very independent life and I don't impose male chauvinistic restrictions upon her. Click to expand I suspect she doesn't want your charity but who knows what your relationship is like, maybe she's just using you or having a fling of her own. Maybe the other woman is just playing games and has no intention of anything long term, maybe she does, maybe she enjoys being a home wrecker... who knows. I'm outta here, I'm off to hang with Lemonaid [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 11:39AM I know most people here think my girlfriend is some poor victim. Nothing could be further from the truth. Click to expand We are only going by what you tell us - that she needs to be protected from being hurt. That you need to be her protector (hah!), keeping her in the dark. Since she's a strong capable adult, why don't you make her an informed adult so she can make her own choices for the situation that she is in? Edited by - lindi on 9/10/2004 11:39:46 AM [Link]
Sir Noel Plum Senior Studmuffin 1001 Posts 2/03	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 3:49PM CupidStunt wrote: ..... My life became months of 1 night stands......... Click to expand that must have been horrible for you, how did you cope SNP. [Link]
Sir Noel Plum Senior Studmuffin 1001 Posts 2/03	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 4:03PM I certainly have a lot of sympathy for this train of thought that says Hardz must tell his gf asap. Certainly from her point of view the longer this goes on the harder it will be for her, and the less she will think of him, when she eventually does find out. That said, according to the man himself, this is not simply some lust fuelled fling , he actually feels he is in love with this other woman. This makes things rather complicated because for all the talk of 'doing the right thing' his decision here will affect how, and perhaps with who, he spends the next months, years or even decades of his life with: this alone allows him a little self interest! Now you are in this situation Hardz my advice would be to go full bore with this new girl, behind your girlfriends back, so that things can come to a head one way or another sooner rather than later. I say you should take her out, fuck her, argue with her; do everything you need to do to be able to make a more valid comparison between what you have sat at home and what you are toying with. I can understand you not having the courage to leave your gf for a relative unknown quantity and likewise why you find it hard to rebuff this girl when you feel she may offer you a level of fulfillment, in all aspects of your life, greater than that which you have now. Strictly speaking you shouldn't have let things progress as they have, but what is done is done, so for all concerned I think the best you can do is to try and lead this to some sort of conclusion sooner rather than later and to me that means you must get deeper into things as fast as possible because each day that goes by is a chance that events may be taken out of your hands. SNP. [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 4:05PM Hardz wrote: Oh, I'd still like to know more about this biting thing. Ted Bundy liked to bite too, so I hope that's just a coincidence Click to expand As I said, she is marking her territory and letting your gf know that something is up. With women, sometimes coincidence and accidents aren't. The hair scrunchie thing dropped in the odd corner, the magazine left in the car, etc. I am okay with spiders. They never bite me, so I leave them alone. At most I show them the door. Centipedes just have to die. They have way too many legs and the coloration is just hostile. It is an irrational thing. [Link]
Sir Noel Plum Senior Studmuffin 1001 Posts 2/03	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 4:53PM Hardz wrote: I love insects esp. spiders. I'll tell you a little spider story.........a few years ago (when I used to live alone) a house spider lived above my wardrobe. It didn't bother me and I didn't bother it, but she must have found a boyfriend or something because one day I came home from work and there were all these little babies on her web. Now I don't kill animals, so I planned to put them outside the next day. I come home the next day and they're all gone (inc. the web).....hummm that's strange I thought, so I asked my girl what she did that morning in my apartment....She points to the vacuum cleaner. Now I've never hit her out of anger, but fuck me I came so close. Click to expand maybe you should bear this in mind though: SNP. Edited by - Sir Noel Plum on 9/10/2004 4:53:10 PM [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 10:23PM Yeah, too late now. She'll either not trust you for the rest of your life, or not trust the next guy(s), ever. Whatever. [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 11:37PM Momentarily disgusted, but still in need of chocolate Lindi? [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 10 2004 : 11:52PM Mmmmm, chocolate. [Link]

croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 2:51AM SNR has a point. Fly into the sun as fast as you can, try not to crash, hope you get enough velocity to slingshot out of the gravitational pull. At this point, since I see sex with #2 as inevitable (based on track record) you may as well act like a full blown couple. See, the great thing about flings is that you don't do all those couples things, so it seems better. Not as much arguing, working around each other's schedules (each being priority #1), etc. The drudgery that drags down everyday life. So do a real comparison. [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 4:46AM This biting thing is getting out of hand. Sometimes I feel like I'm dating a Puma, I don't know if I should kiss her or throw some raw meat at her feet. She actually made me bleed today, so I've put her on a biting ban until she can learn to control herself. [Link]
Arethusa Member Enjoying Sweden 99 Posts 8/02	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 7:47AM As to the biting thing, my last boyfriend did that alot for about the first two weeks we were dating (bit hard, left little lovebite marks in visible places, etc.) and then it tapered off. I suspect it may taper off for you when she feels like you are truly hers. Biting is pretty primal and what Croy said about her marking her territory sounds right. She wants you to be hers and found a visible way to send that message. Just my two cents [Link]
Renee Member 765 Posts 8/03	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 9:35AM Rabbits bite each other during sexual congress. Sometimes they even pull out clumps of fur, leaving visible bald spots. I had to warn you. [Link]
Arethusa Member Enjoying Sweden 99 Posts 8/02	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 10:56AM Renee wrote: Rabbits bite each other during sexual congress. Sometimes they even pull out clumps of fur, leaving visible bald spots. I had to warn you. Click to expand Horses too, the male will dig his teeth into the neck of the mare he is mounting, sometimes resulting in serious injury. But its pretty rare for the female to hurt the male. Only insects and us people do that I suppose. [Link]
astroknight Questionable Moderator Tastes so good... 4187 Posts 11/99	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 12:03PM After reading this thread, I think Tony had the right idea to begin with. That way you're being honest with both of them and seeing if you really can have your cake and eat it to. "Vegetarianism for me is about saying ‘yes’ to things - even meat." - Coupling [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 12:56PM But its pretty rare for the female to hurt the male. Only insects and us people do that I suppose. Click to expand It's sort of a love/hate thing when a female praying mantis or a black widow eats the male after coupling. Evidently devouring the male provides nourishment for the production of eggs, as well as removing the male as a source of potential harm to the young'uns. [Link]
Kperv The Cuddler *struck (She slipped) 1818 Posts 1/04	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 1:11PM lindi wrote: It's sort of a love/hate thing when a female praying mantis or a black widow eats the male after coupling. Click to expand I'll bet. She loves it, he hates it. [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 1:25PM Maybe not. It seems that even when they are aware of their fate, the males are compelled to engage in the act: Even after a male mantis has mated with a female, he is not safe from her tremendous appetite. Females often seize their partners and devour them as soon as they have finished mating. In fact, they sometimes attack the males during the mating act. Males do not resist these attacks and even try to finish their tasks before they are eaten by their ferocious mates. Click to expand From this website. Edited by - lindi on 9/11/2004 1:26:04 PM [Link]
Kperv The Cuddler *struck (She slipped) 1818 Posts 1/04	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 1:57PM Oh, they are so Pussy Whipped. But I know just how they feel. I'd love for more women to channel their inner Ana Nova in bed. Bite me. No really, bite me. [Link]

astroknight Questionable Moderator Tastes so good... 4187 Posts 11/99	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 2:12PM I can't help but wonder, and I think it's the combination of her "I have everything I want" comment and the biting to mark her territory, Fatal Attraction wouldn't be high up in this girl's favorite movie list, would it? With the way she's going, I think it's only a matter of time before she tells your longtime girlfriend. You say it isn't going to be different if you tell her or she finds out, but how is your longterm girlfriend going to react finding out from the fresh meat? "Vegetarianism for me is about saying ‘yes’ to things - even meat." - Coupling [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 10:19PM Hide the rabbits, if only for Renee's sake. [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 11 2004 : 10:23PM lindi wrote: It seems that even when they are aware of their fate, the males are compelled to engage in the act Click to expand Not unlike when we find a woman who we know is trouble. Crazy, but fun. [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 12 2004 : 6:36AM ....another great line from Croy. How about an answer to my question about 'blood' ? [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 12 2004 : 9:10PM I answered it a couple of times, with a couple of other posters agreeing. She's putting her brand on you, letting your gf know that there's a new sherrif in town. Women do this, leave increasingly unsubtle hints that something is wrong. [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 12:32AM Hardz asked where to draw blood if you didn't want to leave a scar. [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 2:00AM Oh, well any small wound or needle mark will heal over time. Repeated damage in a small area will leave a scar long term. In the short term, there will always be a mark. Maybe the better idea is to pick an area that your girlfriend never sees. Maybe sex in the dark is a good idea. I had some other thoughts. Would the attraction be there for #2 if OG (original girlfriend) was not there? The thrill of competiton and the illicit would not be there. I'm not saying she wouldn't be into Hardz, but it is something he needs to figure out. Conversely, would he be as interested in #2? Things to ponder as we await the next episode of As ADT Turns . [Link]
Bob All-Star Member 5516 Posts 3/03	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 3:52AM DarkAngel wrote: "[T]o me the most important aspect of Love is exactly this: Holding that person (and your time with him/her) special and devoted every moment you're NOT together." Click to expand This is one of the smartest things I've read in a long time! Thanks, DarkAngel! I needed to read your quote today. I'm beaming my heartfelt appreciation in your general direction. [Link]
astroknight Questionable Moderator Tastes so good... 4187 Posts 11/99	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 9:04AM My head keeps going back to the comment on it's going to hurt the same if GF#1 finds out now or later. I don't think I know of a single guy who'd rather find out his girlfriend was attracted to somebody else by her telling him rather than having the guy she was seeing on the side coming up to them and asking "How much of me could you taste when you kissed your girlfriend last night?". "Vegetarianism for me is about saying ‘yes’ to things - even meat." - Coupling [Link]
darkangel Member 87 Posts 4/03	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 1:36PM Thanks, DarkAngel! I needed to read your quote today. I'm beaming my heartfelt appreciation in your general direction. Click to expand Always here to help Bob! And thank you for your compliment. [Link]

Ivory Sex Object by Proxy "We all want our time in Hell." 647 Posts 8/04	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 2:31PM This truly is a fascinating real-life soap opera. With whom do our sympathies lie? On the one hand, I feel sorry for Miss Original GF, but on the other hand, I feel like perhaps she has invited this betrayal by staying for 6 years with Hardz, who has no intention of marrying her. Perhaps she truly has a strong disinterest in marriage, as well. Sadly, though, I would guess that she is settling for whatever the relationship gives her (constant companionship, regular sex) with the hope that one day Hardz will propose to her. Now, as for Miss Co-Worker, I cannot respect a person, however smart and emotionally complex and poetically artistic, who lacks the morals to refrain from pursuing a man who is in a committed relationship with somebody else. It might be one thing to say "If you and Original GF ever break up, I'd love to date you", but quite another to throw yourself physically and emotionally at this person. So, bottom line, neither of the women seem to have much self-respect (of course, I don't know them and could be completely off-base). Hardz, of course, is a self-admitted "bastard" in all this (I know it's an incredible emotional rush and ego pump to be at the center of a love triangle--it doesn't make it right.) Therefore, my sympathies lie with none of the three members of this drama. I will, however, continue to read on so I can enjoy being up here on my high horse [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 13 2004 : 6:10PM Giddy up! [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 15 2004 : 3:09PM Yesterday, the girl at work asked me to go shopping with her......fine ok I thought maybe she needs someone to carry some heavy groceries....boy was I wrong. She took me with her to buy underwear and a pair of really sexy knee high boots. Now I'm wondering if she is on more money than me because that stuff wasn't cheap Anyway it's safe to say our next stop will be her bedroom BUT I don't know how far to push her the first time. She says she likes rough sex and when I pull her hair, hard when we kiss she loves it, but the other day I slapped her when we were kissing and she was stunned......"why did you do that?" she asked. Now I'm confused, does she like rough sex or is she just saying that to make me want her more ?????????? [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 15 2004 : 3:39PM She's just saying that. It is also possible to enjoy something as a fantasy, and have no desire to actual do it. Maybe she likes rough but wants to top. Those boots were made for walking... Edited by - lindi on 9/15/2004 3:42:07 PM [Link]
Renee Member 765 Posts 8/03	Posted - Sep 15 2004 : 4:38PM So she wanted you to go shopping with you, and you had no idea you would end up at a lingerie shop! She most likely needed your expert opinion, not your strong arms to carry packages. Now, as to her not likeing you slapping her - it could be that she and you have different ideas about what's rough. I know I used to think rough sex meant hair pulling, and maybe some hard pounding. Then I watched my first Rocco movie, and learned otherwise. I had no idea that slapping was part of the package, as well as spitting, pounding anal, and shoving. Maybe lindi's right - your lady friend may want it rough, but she wants you to be on the receiving end of the rough treatment. Hey, even Rocco likes to get face-slapped, and have his hair pulled; he positively has a gleam in his eye when that happens. Whatever, keep us informed! This is way more interesting than any porn movie that I've watched recently (If any of you porn directors are reading this, that comment was meant for you). [Link]
lindi Senior Member 12345 3205 Posts 9/02	Posted - Sep 15 2004 : 11:07PM Renee has a point. Lots of women who like a little spanking and hair pulling, as a sign of urgency and passion, are not interested when it crosses the line into anything designed to hurt or degrade. [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 15 2004 : 11:52PM Not to discount the above, but she may not have taken you seriously. Lots of guys talk big. Or she just said that she like what you like, not unlike a guy claiming interest in whatever the girl seems to like. But I'd have to go with what Lindi said, that she probably just likes it a little rough, as a sign you need her so bad. You didn't see lingerie coming at all when she said shopping? She's been going all out! Remember how jealous you felt when she talked to other guys? Renee is right, those of us who read this thread are pretty entertained. I was actually going to ask for an update. [Link]
scipio Senior Member 1901 Posts 2/00	Posted - Sep 16 2004 : 7:51AM I rarely post in this section of the boards, but I've also become a regular soap opera viewer. I'm sure the consummation of all of this isn't far away, I'm interested reading all about it, the aftermath, and the recriminations.. you've got me hooked, dammit! cheers, scipio [Link]
Sir Noel Plum Senior Studmuffin 1001 Posts 2/03	Posted - Sep 16 2004 : 9:02AM lindi wrote: Renee has a point. Lots of women who like a little spanking and hair pulling, as a sign of urgency and passion, are not interested when it crosses the line into anything designed to hurt or degrade. Click to expand Whatever is the case I certainly think you need to hold back a little the first time. For all she knows you might turn into a foaming frothing maniac once the bedroom door shuts and what she might enjoy in her mind, and with you after she has been physically intimate with you a couple of times, might worry her slightly straight off the bat. SNP. [Link]
darkangel Member 87 Posts 4/03	Posted - Sep 16 2004 : 11:07AM Anybody want to start a pool on how long it takes GF #1 to find out? lindi wrote: Renee has a point. Lots of women who like a little spanking and hair pulling, as a sign of urgency and passion, are not interested when it crosses the line into anything designed to hurt or degrade. Click to expand I'm also in agreement that she's not really into the rought stuff (yet at least). The dead give away? She didn't already have a pair of Boots! [Link]
d3pr4v3d m4n14c Member 18 Posts 6/04	Posted - Sep 17 2004 : 3:21AM Hardz wrote: I've been with my girl for 6 years (on and off) and she's up for pretty much everything. So life is sweet, but there's a girl who's just started at work who I get on with a little too well. Now I'm not totally stupid, and know that being attracted to her ass isn't love, but I'm totally attracted to her mind. Now that's something I thought I'd never say ever . When I'm with her, my heart beats so fast, I think I'm going to die and it's mainly because I know if I ask her for anything , I'll get it. Is it possible to be 'just friends' with a girl who gives you 'the feeling' ? This sucks! Click to expand You are greedy. Send one of them over this way! [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 17 2004 : 11:29AM Hell No [Link]
Hardz Member Hell on Earth 877 Posts 6/01	Posted - Sep 21 2004 : 1:07PM I found out why she doesn't like to be slapped........yesterday we were playing around and I slapped her again during a kiss and she started crying. Thing is, her alcoholic father used to hurt her when she was younger and it's something she can't deal with. I'm going to have to control myself around her but it's not easy. To make her happy, after work I took her to a local playground (you know with swings and stuff), on my bike. We were having a great time but while I was eating ice cream off her belly button some Son of a Bitch stole my bike because I forgot to remove the keys. The worst thing is, I just had the bike customized last month and it wasn't cheap. Bloody thieves everywhere nowadays [Link]
croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04	Posted - Sep 21 2004 : 10:42PM Insured I hope. No updates on the home front? This is a two part storty you know. [Link]
Kperv The Cuddler *struck (She slipped) 1818 Posts 1/04	Posted - Sep 22 2004 : 2:19AM I feel like I should change my vote in the favourite soap poll. This story's got it all. A slap happy bigamist. The devoted SO at home. The lover with a tragic past. And now the criminal element enters the story. When is the next instalment. I'll make some pop corn. It really does sound like her idea of rough sex is along the lines of you pinning her against the wall thrusting away, greedily kissing her and occasionally pulling her hair, while she leaves the odd bite mark. To go with the porn theme of ADT, she's expecting Eric Everhard in a gentle mood not Brandon Iron all guns blazing. And you were looking for Melissa "don't worry about bruises' Lauren, but you've got the little firecracker Lilly "pull my hair/I hate spanking" Thai. Do keep us posted, please. [Link]
DP Jones Member 511 Posts 10/03	Posted - Sep 25 2004 : 1:49AM I love how some people are in a "dilemma".Oh,poor me,I'm with 2 women,I hope the other doesn't find out then I've lost out on half my fun. And meanwhile,the biggest "action"in my life is that Malorie Marx did a DP. In some ways,I don't see what the problems is.The main obstacle is that people refuse to be honest with themselves.If your M.O. is to simply be true to yourself,then you might as well go for it!And let the chips fall where they may.If the other girl gets hurt,what's lost?You had 6 years together,which will probably be followed by a few months of we-broke-up-but-we-still-get-together-and-fuck. I don't know how old you are,but you're not commited to anything are you,no marriage,no kids?What's the worst that could happen,you got your jollies and one girl(or both,eventually)got pissed off at you?There are plenty of people out there to enjoy.I'm not saying that's what I would do,but maybe that's the best thing for you.You are obviously thinking of yourself and your libido first,so take care of #1 first!People need to stop "keeping up appearances"and be honest,but I guess that would take some of the illicit fun out of it right? If you were 100% OK with your situation,you wouldn't be asking for advice. (This message has been brought to you by a porn addicted pervert who hasn't a clue about women.) [Link]