There's no such thing as inexistence.

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There's no such thing as inexistence.

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There's no such thing as inexistence.

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If you can't get a job, find something that interests you and get into some study.

This will get you:
Out of the house.
Some skills or marketability.
Interacting with real life humans. Not anonymous nobodies on the interweb.
Some of them are girls. Practice talking to them as people instead of potential lovers. Just doing this will improve your confidence in speaking to the opposite sex.

If it's just nerves.. honestly, just suck it up, grow some balls and do it. Look at ShiWarrior's recent escapades. He started as nerveous as all hell, now he's a veteran.

When it comes down to it though, wasting time on the internet is fun, but chances are you'll never meet any of us, and eventually we'll all move on from ADT at some point or another and you'll have nothing left from this.

Sure people on the net can be nice, intelligent, offer many perspectives different to your own, etc, but your life is what's going on right now, and the most valuable experiences you'll have aren't reading this post, they're outside.

Play on the net by all means, but live your life outside as well. Otherwise, one day 10 years down the track you'll wake up one morning, and wonder where a huge chunk of your life went.

Life is hard sometimes, but you've got a far better lot in life than most of the world's population. Make the most of it while you can.

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It was all with the best of intentions and I reckon you have made some progress. But I have to +1 scipio.

Change in tactics, mate. You've had a lot of excellent advice and its not working. So, I almost feel like I need to make you feel embarrassed or something. I don't mean to be nasty, I just want the best for you. You're very talented and totally underestimate yourself, and I'm just getting so frustrated now!

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As for the two paragraphs you quoted I don't think they're mutually exclusive. I want to know I had sex with a girl and made her cum, not just put my penis into her, otherwise it's not sex somehow, it's just accompanied masturbation.

I already wonder now where all these years have gone. My environment raised me to obey, not to become a self-dependant adult. And suddenly no one is there to lead anymore and everything I believed in and worked my butt off for (because I knew nothing else) crashed and all my efforts had been in vain.
I know, it sounds like a cheap excuse and a try to blame it on others. But what can I say, I was paralyzed by fear (especially of hell) my whole life long and still am. Whatever I do is staying where I feel comfortable and avoiding fear. It may be wrong but I hope it's at least understandable somehow.

I know I've got a better lot than most others and I often had a bad conscience because of that. But it's the things one cannot see I lack most. Those that are not essential to survive. Those that make the difference between existence and life - love and happiness. These don't come from material wealth and I don't want to have a bad conscience anymore that I'm unhappy even though I have a better lot than most. I blamed myself for everything my whole life long (well, until I started to think for myself, watch porn and so on), now I've become too tired for that.

Robbie, please don't be frustrated. I've been looking for advice since years now and never managed to put anything into action. I just didn't completely give up everything yet though I'm pretty hopeless. Please don't expect anything will change anytime soon. Maybe it will, maybe it won't. I'm so used not to get what I want (concerning immaterial things) that I just don't believe in anything anymore - well, except for going to hell. That doesn't help, and forced belief doesn't work.

And please don't stop being the good friends you are "for my own good". I won't blame anyone if I get the feeling that I wasted my time some day. It's my own decision to be here - finally something that is my own decision.

Maybe we should let this thread rest now and have fun in the others. There's a lot of great advice here, and if I ever overcome my angst then maybe I'll succeed. Since there obviously is no trick to get some without confidence I have to get rid of my fears first.

Edited by - VincentVanGauge on 8/25/2005 9:45:18 AM

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VVG, a man with nothing to lose is the most dangerous of all.
With nothing to lose, there is no reason to hold back from achieving a goal.
Don't wait until then.

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