annoying and/or overpowering music
excessive tattoos
fake tits
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Dirty Auditions 14 - review by Captain Jack| Author | Post |
|---|---|
| Kamp Member  369 Posts 8/03 |  Posted - May 29 2005 : 6:22AMIrritations in Porn (customer point of view) >Girls wearing clothes (i was watching a Lisa Sparxxx scene, and she didn't got fully naked, same in a Alicia Rhodes scene i just watched. >Girls wearing shoes. I'd like to see more barefoot action. >The use of couches in stead of beds. .....let me know your irritations..... [Link] |
| techie Member 62 Posts 4/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 6:46AM annoying and/or overpowering music excessive tattoos fake tits [Link] |
| STEMCELL Senior Member Russia+China are Terror states 1540 Posts 8/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 7:03AM [Link] |
| The Sexecutioner Member Melbourne 17 Posts 2/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 7:16AM [Link] |
| KMGINC Member Texas 17 Posts 2/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 7:19AM 1) Male talent making more noise than the female performer. 2) Directors that ruin what could have been a good scene with bad lighting, shit camera angles, fucked up editing, and bad overall composition. "Take a fucking course in photography-RTF, read a book on the subject do something...Most porn directors are manifestly ignorant on these subjects." IMHO 3)Way too many companies making way too much shitty product. The list could go on... [Link] |
| threesomebody Official BlowBang Judge Would you like my autograph? 2491 Posts 12/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 7:52AM +1 clothed to unclothed cuts without the actual stripping Also, too much oooh'ing and aaaaah'ing and not enough dirty talk. [Link] |
| Linda Graham11 Member 86 Posts 10/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 2:56PM Fake screaming. It's a dick, not a butcher knife for Christ's sake... AND the ones who just go through the motions and look like they would rather be getting their teeth cleaned. Men jerking themselves off when there is a woman right there. WTF?! Let her do it! Bad boob jobs. Pierced genitalia. G/G scenes. [Link] |
| Rumpled Foreskin Member 310 Posts 5/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 3:04PM [Link] |
| MASAMUNE Senior Member 1452 Posts 12/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 4:40PM
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| green-toke Member Loc: Kyoto, Japan 159 Posts 4/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 4:44PM [Link] |
| juha Senior Member 2752 Posts 3/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 4:54PM I mean G/G-fans have WTBA und WTBAATGWP. Equal rights for the B/G-fans! [Link] |
| MASAMUNE Senior Member 1452 Posts 12/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 5:08PM [Link] |
| Bickle T. Member UK 140 Posts 9/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 6:38PM "How old are you?" "22." "And how old is this pussy?" "22." "What do you like to put in there?" "Umm." Edited by - Bickle T. on 5/29/2005 6:38:51 PM [Link] |
| Mike Hardcore New Member 3 Posts 5/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 6:39PM 2) A girl saying God, God, Oh God ! ....God have nothing do to with this, i don`t know, screen O shit, or O man, or O yeah but plz let God out of this. 3) +1 for the More Dirty Talk than AAAAAA, OOOOOOOO, AAAA etc 4) +1 for the male making more noise than the girl 5) + to the bad boob jobs 6) No equal skin color...when the girl is really dark then she let her top fall off and the tits are white... 7) Taking Pic with a flash in a scene...use no flash and we dont want to hear the click click... 8) +1 to music that cover the sound of the sex... 9) Pierce Thong...i like tatoo but piercing never exit me, exept for hear of course and in the thong its worst than other part... 10) The girl spit and spit at every time a small quantity of cum go in her mouth...at least wait til the guy have finish than spit all of it out... 11) My most hate...when 2 girl make a scene with a guy and only one of the girl receive the facial and its the less beautiful of the 2... The list could go a lot longer [Link] |
| jamesn Senior Member Cambridge, MA 750 Posts 1/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 8:27PM i also suspect many times you don't see their stomach-area it's to conceal c-section scarring. Edited by - jamesboston on 5/29/2005 8:28:23 PM [Link] |
| BigBobxxx Senior Member 2681 Posts 5/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 8:56PM Cutting to the stud's face during the cumshot. [Link] |
| axlsfury Senior Member 1110 Posts 7/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 9:03PM [Link] |
Hardware  All-Star Member Your other left 14595 Posts 3/02 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 9:04PM > Producers who think hiring performers entitles them to free sex > Editors on crack who can't stand over 3 seconds of continuity. > Shooters so bored with it all they pay more attention to the plant life than the action. [Link] |
| respect Member 200 Posts 11/04 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 9:31PM [Link] |
| CodeMonkey Member 363 Posts 2/05 | Posted - May 29 2005 : 11:52PM Quick cuts that miss the action, poor lighting, crappy soundtracks that cover up the natural sounds, poor camera angles and overall poor videography. I've got semi-amateur titles in my collection that are way better than a lot of the titles I've bought from major studios with regards to technical aspects of the production. Overly artificial mammary glands (I felt like finding a different way to say "bad boob jobs") Not enough close-ups to satisfy my gyno-fetish desires to see a girl's goodies. Also, lack of -- or not enough -- gapes of both a woman's pretty openings. Lack of direction to get the woman to best show off her body -- many actresses could show off their butt, legs, boobs, etc. much better if they would arch their back or spread their legs a bit when their in certain positions. Overly directed formulaic scenes where the director gets too involved in directing making a scene seem like the actresses are just going through the motions without any passion. Actresses being too loud with overly hysterical moans -- why in a G/G scene is it that the woman who is servicing another woman makes just as much or more noise than the woman who is actually being stimulated? Conversely, actresses being overly quiet (especially in solo scenes -- at least show some personality by making some noise or talking dirty or it just becomes too clinical and boring). [Link] |
| budtugley Senior Member One man's trash can be the next man's treasure. 1187 Posts 1/04 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 3:33AM Ladies with nice tits keeping their bras on during the action. Drives me up the wall. Some of the music the producers use. I love good shit-kicking rock 'n' roll, but that heavy metal, headache-inducing shit they use makes me reach for the tylenol bottle. How many more porn chicks are going to the butcher shop for ugly augmentation, stop at the hair salon for petro-chemical bleaching, and visit the tattoo/piercing parlor until they look like they were used for target practice by a paintball team? Porn has had 5,000 ladies with bleached-blonde, fake boobs, tattoos and piercings. No more, please? [Link] |
| lou sapphire Member Take the plan, spin it sideways. 685 Posts 9/02 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 3:39AM Edited by - lou sapphire on 6/1/2005 3:39:26 AM [Link] |
| matchmaker Senior Member 24913 Posts 4/05 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 4:14AM -Slow-motion. -Faking it during the scenes. -When the music drowns out the moaning. -When scenes are too short. -I also don't like it when women have their clothes on while having sex. -Bad editing. -Bad camera work (camera in the wrong place at the wrong time). -Seeing the guy's face as he's jerking off at the end of the scene. [Link] |
| croy Platinum Member Discovry 4574 Posts 3/04 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 4:53AM Faking it (if you aren't into women, don't do girl/girl) Air licking. [Link] |
| cosmic Deactivated User 134 Posts 11/02 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 6:37AM In the 70' many french actress continue a raw blowjob until the partner has to finish to ejaculating in their mouths and then............................... [Link] |
| Robbie Member 884 Posts 1/05 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 9:35AM [Link] |
| Rumpled Foreskin Member 310 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 9:59AM [Link] |
| AlexPanzer Deactivated User 1593 Posts 6/03 | Posted - Jun 1 2005 : 12:24PM [Link] |
| m_burlock Member 375 Posts 3/04 | Posted - Jun 3 2005 : 5:56PM -guys that are not well hung. -girls with a bad boob job. -fat girls. -flat chested girls. -bad lighting. -not being able to hear the natural sounds of the couple fucking. -any music of any kind in the vid. -bad camera angles. -shots of the guys (usually hairy) butt. -dry pussies. -the couple not getting COMPLETELY naked. -shooting the guys face not his dick as he cums. -tacky outfits on the girls. -fat guys. -pale skinned girls or guys. -a weak/small cum shot. -guys that look like some homeless dude, that kind of ugly. -girls with cystic acne or just too many zits on their face. -a zit(s) or an ingrown hair(s) on a girls butt. -a girl with razor burn where her pussy hair used to be. -a girl with lots of moles. -a girl with both crooked and dirty teeth. -a girl with stubble: in her pits, on her legs, and or on her pussy. -the guy talking too much. I.E. in one particular oriental DVD (one of the "Sinful Asians" series) Michael Stefano/___?___ Long kept saying "Baby!" or "Ohhh Baby!" OVER AND OVER, it drove me nuts! -the guy making more noise than the girl. I DON'T want to hear HIM I want to hear HER! -hairy pussies! Ladies, PLEASE, do SOME pruning at LEAST! Edited by - m_burlock on 6/7/2005 5:09:06 PM [Link] |
| EL_ Member Browsing with Mouse Gestures 193 Posts 7/04 | Posted - Jun 4 2005 : 12:10AM [Link] |
| Tarkus Member Las Vegas 8 Posts 11/03 | Posted - Jun 4 2005 : 5:09PM [Link] |
| Joel Member 331 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 4 2005 : 6:29PM cuts from clothed to nude crap cumshots [Link] |
| Phlogiston Deactivated User Whore-loving Thought Criminal 92 Posts 6/05 | Posted - Jun 4 2005 : 11:03PM [Link] |
| Aplus Senior Member 1431 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 5:12AM Poor Camerawork. The action should never stray too far from the women's face. Too many close-ups, and not enough medium or full-length shots. Horrible editing. Biggest complaint by far. Just no continuation in most scenes. One second the guy is soft, the next he's hard. Cuts to different positions out of nowhere. Having to watch a guy jerk off in a girls face for 2-3 minutes...way too long. Stopping the end of the sex scene too fast. Some hot and/or interesting things can happen right after the guy cums. Having to watch guys jerk off in the girls face. Guys please let her jerk you off...usually they'll get into a little more if you do. Or learn to pull-out and pop. Quit hiring girls/guys that won't put out. I don't care how hot they are, if they don't like sex, they shouldn't be in a porno film. Directors that over-direct sex scenes. Your never gonna be Ron Howard, so please stop with the over pretense. I have no problem with a story or certain acts really, but sex isn't that complicated. Let the performers fuck! Way too much faking going on. They're screaming and hollering one minute, then then not out of breath or even breathing hard after the guy cums. If your not attracted to someone, simply don't have sex with them. Having the girl enter the scene, then having them lie/sit down immediately. I want to see all of their bodies. Too many position changes. 4-5 changes I can live with, but 9-10 is just too damn many. How's the woman supposed to really enjoy it if you're changing positions every minute. [Link] |
| BigBobxxx Senior Member 2681 Posts 5/04 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 6:45AM [Link] |
| Miroku Member 53 Posts 7/04 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 9:34AM [Link] |
| Hardware All-Star Member Your other left 14595 Posts 3/02 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 12:09PM Plus, performers have commented in the forums several times that they didn't know who the male performer was going to be beforehand. [Link] |
| TonyC Comstock Films 2523 Posts 8/03 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 12:26PM Also bear in mind that a cunt's or asshole's ablity to happily accommodate large objects can be substantially changed by the mental state of said cunt's or asshole's owner. Why only just last week, a woman who had previously described herself as "size-adverse" found herself eagerly taking her husband's whole hand after watching a particularly arousing erotic film. If a hightenned state of arrousal can precipitate startling new feats of vaginal capacity in one woman, I don't think it's a stretch of the imagination that if a shoot had a particularly unsexy vibe it might impinge on a woman's ability to enjoy, or even feign enjoying being penetrated by an oversized cock. -T.C. Comstock Films:Real Life, Real People, Real Sex [Link] |
| Pete Zaface Senior Member 3064 Posts 8/03 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 12:26PM I do believe that a girl can enjoy it when when a guy cums in her mouth, though I acknowledge that it takes skill on the part pf the blower, the blowee and the cameraman to bring that off on film. What I can believe, and what I see so rarely, is a girl asking a guy to shoot on her face because she knows he wants to, because she knows it will bring HIM (and, by extension, the viewer) some pleasure. Cris Taliana did that really well in a scene from a video whose title I don't recall. But begging for a cumshot because she wants it? I believe that about as much as I believe that the Bang Bus guys are really driving around and picking up chicks on the street. [Link] |
| Tarkus Member Las Vegas 8 Posts 11/03 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 12:32PM [Link] |
| odelay.1 Member 55 Posts 3/04 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 1:08PM also i want to see more of the girls ass . ie dont just have the girl on the bed, have her enter the room - or walk off into the bathroom , showing us that ass after a good fucking! [Link] |
| ballsonchin Member 331 Posts 12/04 | Posted - Jun 5 2005 : 2:49PM [Link] |
| Aplus Senior Member 1431 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 2:52AM Directors talking non-stop to the performers while they're right in the middle of sex. Just get tired on watching the performers stare at the directors. If you gotta talk to them, talk while their faces isn't in the frame, or at least edit it out. Better yet, quit talking so much and let them fuck. [Link] |
| ChickenMaster New Member 4 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 2:57AM [Link] |
| green-toke Member Loc: Kyoto, Japan 159 Posts 4/05 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 3:11AM [Link] |
| ChickenMaster New Member 4 Posts 5/05 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 3:17AM [Link] |
| Tarkus Member Las Vegas 8 Posts 11/03 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 3:28AM For this reason I can't watch the BangBus series, even though some of it is very appealing, visually. I just can't take the guy yammering in the background. [Link] |
| Gunzo Senior Member 1377 Posts 2/05 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 5:19AM * Clothes on, especially when it looks like it's supposed to hide the stumic flubber, I don't like the flubber, but I want to know if it's there or not. * Great positions cut early. We see like several minutes of RCA, then just half a minute doggie anal etc. * Posing. Performers who try to look like models instead of going at it with love. Frequent in mainstream. A guy holding his hip etc like his still in front of the mirror etc. * Arty shit with a set costing more than the performers. Wait, there's more... [Link] |
| Zartyr Member 700 Posts 7/04 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 5:29PM - all naked videos; Heck, wolford, La Perla and DeMask exist - showing positions for extended periods - actors who don't know that to look good on camera they have to assume certain poses - a set which does not contribute to the atmosphere or looks cheap [Link] |
| Tarkus Member Las Vegas 8 Posts 11/03 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 6:10PM Worse still is long scenes that are nothing but a blowjob. I don't care if the chick can swallow a light saber from Star Wars, after five or ten minutes, I'm going to be bored to death. In short, repetition will kill even the best scenes. Tease, deliver, and then move on. And don't forget the first part of that (tease). [Link] |
| eduardo911 Senior Member 1299 Posts 8/03 | Posted - Jun 7 2005 : 6:36PM [Link] |
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