Extreme Associates R.I.P. Wanker Wang Writes: I'm crying as I write this. It's about as official as it can be without being absolutely official. The once almighty Extreme Associates is sputtering on for dear life, clinging for any vestige of value it may have once had. I hear it all the time from people all around me. I hear it from distributors, duplicators, replicators, talent, print people, photo developers, everyone. I can say that Extreme is now a dead company. One stop stores are fleeing from Extreme product as their lines sell, at best, 800 units out the door. Some distributors are pissed at the low grade, second generation tapes. Some distributors are pissed because they sold product for a quick cash infusion for pennies on the dollar to a wholesaler. The few directors inside are pissed because it's nearly impossible to book talent who are afraid of bounced checks. Any level of qualified post production facilitators will not take Extreme accounts for fear they won't be paid. And as the compilation titles, foreign titles, and cheap blowjob titles grow, the value of Extreme has taken a steep downward spiral making the owners of Fat Dog Productions proud.
It's a remarkable turn of events for a company which once housed some of the best talent in the business. Bar none. Imagine a company which had contract girls such as Kristi Myst, Jessica Darlin, Alana Evans, Cherry Mirage, Ashlyn Gere, Amber Lynn, Monique, Tiffany Mynx, Veronica Caine. Now they have nothing. Absolutely nothing. Imagine a company which once had among its employees Luciano, Slain Wayne, Van Damage, Brandon Irons, Craig Daze, Mark Woods, Mark Kulkis, David Aaron Clark, Jane Waters, Francesca Le, Charlie Crow, David Luger. Now they have nothing. In nearly every single situation, there were monetary or loyalty issues.
In the past year, they have lost, for better or for worse, nearly their entire staff. Gene Ross, Thomas Zupko, Dave Penycofe, Brad Siskin, their entire administrative staff, Venus Bomb and her mail order staff, and Johnny Webb, their head editor. And they haven't been replaced. I always said that if Webb left, so goes the entire company. Meanwhile, not only does female talent refuse to work there, male talent feels the same way as they resort to retards like Burke and some bald headed 40 year old named Adam as their key male talent. They have to resort to blowjob-forcing, phone stalkers like Steve Austin who tells girls never to work for Extreme on the drive over there.
It's so sad. I worked there for nearly 7 months as the only webmaster. But I did, in fact, see the writing on the wall at one point. One pivotal day told me I had to bail. Everyone there knew it was coming but no one said anything. It was a Friday. There was a crowd in the lobby waiting for checks which I knew would not clear. Then I received a call from a girl in Colorado who starred in numerous scenes months before who's check did not clear and had an arrest warrant out for her in Colorado based on bad checks she wrote. Her mother called, pleading with me to help her daughter. Her daughter had to tell the mother what she did because she didn't know what to do. I nearly wrote out a check to her myself as I did on numerous occasions. That was the icing on the cake. I knew I was gone the second after I took that call. I asked Dave, the accountant, that this check had to clear, especially for moral reasons. He informed me they simply did not have the money. I don't lead my life that way, and I felt inherently responsible for the ills of the company. I didn't let Extreme down. They let me down. The longer you stay under a circumstance of that nature, the more responsible you become.
And that next day, I came in early, packed my stuff, and left. I drove all the way to the G.M.'s apartment and threw the keys at him. I was pissed with nowhere to go. I was so fucking naive at that point, I practically didn't know any other companies existed.
However, it was at Extreme that I learned everything I could. Gene Ross took me under his wing, tutoring me about the entire industry. I was hungry to learn every facet of guerrilla webmastering and filmmaking that I couldn't learn from my University. It was the greatest learning opportunity I could imagine. And once the learning curve stopped, once the enthusiasm died, it was time to go. When I left, the avalanche just started as a string of firings and quittings began. The badge of honor became a badge of shame. Luckily, I went from the worst company out there to the best, and now I'm venturing out on my own to do my own thing. It was all because of Extreme Associates. Extreme was a temporary bus stop for wayward newbie bastards like myself.
So it saddens me to report that Extreme is now dead. Maybe not officially. Their adamant devotion to wrestling has destroyed and decimated the company. Their insistence on keeping two bonafide idiots like Kevin Kleinrock and Smiley Johnson whose entire roles in life is to wipe the owner's ass has annihilated the company. I refused to kiss ass like those two humble-pie eating butlers. And their horrendous financial practices have made it virtually impossible to come out with new titles. The only remaining saving graces for the company are Derek Newblood, Scott Snot, and Tom Byron. But I have a feeling things will change even more in the coming weeks. I personally love Rob, Lizzy, and Tommy. So it saddens me to bid adieu. What happens when a production company tries to shout but all you hear is the faint gasps for air?
It's over.
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Posted - Jan 22 2003 : 4:32PM