Use fingers, gently. Start doing that all the time, when you've really got her going during vaginal sex. Or when you've really got her going as your licking her out. But don't try to turn that into the full thing right away. Wait for her to ask for it. Have the attitude that it will come inevitably, when she's ready. In fact you just might want to turn her down the first few times she asks for it, while you're using fingers there. She may be asking cause she's thinking YOU obviously really want to. Given all the attention there. So maybe she should try it. So in other words she expecting to NOT like it. Wait for her to be at least half expecting she WILL like it. She'll get hot enough from the right sort of finger action there to just about demand it after a while. HOT!

If she "accuses" you of trying to sucker her into it, just say she'll see, eventually. You're in no hurry. She'll see what she's been missing eventually. Like its some big great thing she's missing out on, if its done right. (Which it is.)

Also try licking her there. After you've already gotten her good and hot. She may object, but it won't be because the licking (rimming) doesn't FEEL good. That ALWAYS feels good to EVERYBODY, right from the get go. Some (many people) just have mental blocks to begin with about it being too "gross" -- thinking you've got to be really turned off and are just doing it to earn points or something. So get her all pussy licked first, and then go round the bend a little. If she objects say you love doing it, cause you love affecting her, and she should just relax, and see -- and go back at it.

Make stimulating her ass and hole a regular thing. She'll get into it by and by, when she's really hot and bothered.

The worst thing to do is to try to talk or especially argue her into it. That makes it something you want and she doesn't. And means if she does it she's given in to you. (Well, I'm assuming she's not the type that likes to do that consciously on things you've disagreed about.)

Occassionally mentioning anal this or that casually can be good -- but avoid talking about it as something on your agenda with her. The idea is to get her thinking about it as normal, at least among sex adventurous fun types, rather than something that can't be mentioned (if she's got that head).

If she DOES want to talk about it, tell her its just a muscle. It hurts a lot if its pushed too far to fast. You can even rip the muscle if someone is especially brutal to someone who's not used to it, etc. But if you slowly get it used to different dilations at no faster pace than it can take, it works great. And no, it doesn't get permanently gaped, the muscle just gets different opening abilities. (If you don't do the brutal virgin rip bit that is.)

Also, don't make her think that if she lets you do it, its gonna only be that and only that from then on, or gonna always end with that. Have her think of it as a rare, or occassional thing to do when she gets really crazy. Then see how it in fact goes.

Edited by - dexplorer on Sep 28 2001

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Gator

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Well maybe occasional cumshots can feel fun and nasty to do in real life. I'd probably want to do it more as a stand alone bukkake (probably after she's gotten licked), than as an ending to the full monty though.

Can't say that that's something I've every focused on though. It's an idea to play with though. Maybe sometime when it feels right and nasty.

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I just think the porn viewing public has been conditioned for cumshots.

I mean sure, sometimes its great. But I still think mainly from oral, and I still rather see him cum in her mouth, and then have it drool and licked around.

Cumshots to me are for the gangbang extras to add so bukkake mess to the scene.

Mostly.

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I was told by my woman that she would never ever have anal sex.

I first started doing things like grabbing her ass while she was on top, and spreading her ass to where it was good and taught. Then it eventually went to doing things like touching, massaging, and occasionally pushing the tip of my finger against her anal opening. Or when I went down on her I would make sure she was on her stomach while I was eating her out. That way I had the tip of my nose pressing against her asshole. It helps if you put a pillow or two under her hips, so her ass is nice and vunerable to your licking. I occasionally would make the "mistake" of running my tongue across her asshole from time to time. She eventually got to where she would automatically get on her stomach when I wanted to go down on her. One evening when I "accidently" licked her I stayed there couple of seconds extra, and went back to business as usual. Well, she started pushing backward with her ass. So I thought I was getting her really worked up and started going to town on her clit. She told me that it felt great and all but she was curious to know whether I would lick her ass or not. I did my best to give her the best licking I could. It was wonderful that she was pushing back really hard. It got to where she was having me licking her ass on a regular basis. I developed this technique to where I would insert 2 or 3 fingers in her pussy and hook them back towards me and push outward on her asshole. This would really expose her anus to my licking. I'm sure many others have done this, but at that time in my life I would have never told anyone that I loved licking my girl's ass as much as licking her pussy. All of this happened over the course of two years. I never got to do her anally, but she wanted it. I'm just really well endowed so I tried a couple of times but she wasn't ready anally. I was getting closer and closer before our relationship ended. If I were to be able to do that again, I would. It's was more fun trying to get her to come over to my side of the fence, than just being able to stick it in. I feel all of this was possible because of our level of trust with each other in bed.

Edited by - DigitalDave on Sep 14 2001

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All you need is a long rope, a gun, a nail clipper and a rubber duck.

Wanna be my friend? ICQ 17282310

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The MAIN thing I like about anal sex, actually, is how crazy it can make some women. Well, just about any woman in my experience, if you have had enough time with her to properly "break her in" (assuming she isn't already there).

In terms of just my own sensation, I tend to prefer pussy fucking more myself. Yeah, I know a lot of guys talk about how TIGHT asses usually are. But that doesn't do much for me. Actually, that's rather the downside of it from my perspective. Not that I like REALLY loose pussies, but I've rarely had that actually be much of a problem.

But the biggest thrill of all for me is REALLY driving a woman crazy. And ass fucking is great for that. I also really love to take a woman to a place she's never been before, or never been happily before. Anal sex is like that for a whole lot of women. (So are some other things.)

One of the reasons I thought to throw this in, belatedly, is that it could be a good thing to tell a woman. I mean I usually do, if there's reluctance, at some point. Tends to make them realize they may have the wrong idea about it.

2nd thing I want to add is this. I just read Steph's review of "The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women." The following is from Steph's review:

Need I say more?

Even for guys who ordinarily rent, unless their WIFE is already a gonzo anal convert, this sounds like a MUST HAVE to me!!!

Haven't seen it. Gonna get it.

One cautionary note though. I would think this is obvious to everyone, but I've discovered it actually isn't, so let me state the (I would think) obvious.

There are two reasons why HIV/AIDS is so much more prevalent in the gay community than in the straight one. The first is that gay guys have way more partners over a period of years on average than straights do. WAY more, as in an order of magnatude or two. (Probably because guys are, on average, way more promiscuous, or would like to be, than women are, and gays have only guys to "negotiate" with.) But the second one and the relevant one here is that anal sex is WAY more likely to transmit HIV/AIDS than any other sexual practice. (You are actually very unlikely to contract HIV even if you have unprotected varinal sex with an HIV carrier -- if you don't have any sores or lacerations at the time on your sex organ. Especially guys.) Anal sex is another matter entirely. So you GOTTA use a condom for anal sex, unless you and your partner have just had one of those rapid detection HIV tests the porn industry uses (and which aren't that common outside of it.)

Edited by - dexplorer on Sep 28 2001

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NEVER, EVER f*ck a girl in the ass, then after you butt-bang her, stick your shitty d*ck back in her vagina. It's not tolerable (not healthy at all). To start it all off, you may wanna lick it, finger it (THEN slip 2 fingers in it). To get her more open, use some toys (of course) like some anal beads, a dildo and whatnot... but don't argue her down about it and don't fight with her.

If you 2 enjoy it or if you are turning her onto it... bend that ass over and pound away until she cries! People (guys, mostly) love anal sex because they love the thought of being in between someone's behind and they know their partner will be driven wildly by it and the partner gets a lot of feeling in their shit-holes! Guys also like the fact that they are in control when they fuck some ass. There are a # of reasons why anal sex is so good to people! Especially if a guy LOVES the female behind. The female butt is the most praised, yet noticable part of the female body. I know, because I love it to death.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW: Anal sex can cause pregnancy! If you do a girl in her booty and come inside of her butt-hole, your sperm will sink down into the back of her vagina walls and the sperm will go into her vagina. Then, she's pregnant. Deng di-lei!

QUOTE: "Don't take the brown eye if she's fightin'. Because you saw what happened to Tupac & Mike Tyson!"

Nei lo mo-ah! Yuk ngoh?
(Translation- You motherf*cker! Hit me?)
-Quote taken from HK movie 'Long Arm of the Law 3')

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